This article should not come as a shock to anyone. Knowing when it’s time to let go, and then, doing it, is something that we must all face regardless the area of life that we focus on.
The process of letting something go is not an easy one. It does not matter if it is a well-paying job, relationship, friendship, or even family sometimes—the point being is that sometimes in life we have to know when it is time to let go.
Why is hard to let go of things
So first, why is it hard to let go? In an article from Psychology Today, Dr. Lickerman explains, “the process of being able to let go comes with the understanding of two things.”
The first understanding of deciding to let go of something is, the desire you have comes as the result of a belief about what you need to be happy.
Secondly, no matter how connected you are to something, you do not need to rely on any one thing or person to be happy.
Happiness is not dependent on anything external to you, it is an internal process. But, after reading these two statements, it is easy to see why most people have problems letting go of things.
Some people do not fully understand that obtaining happiness is not sometimes what we think it is.
When it’s time to let go and YOU
People tend to forget the importance of being in tune with themselves. Happiness is seen as a fixed item that can be attained through people, places, or things. This cannot be furthest from the truth.
Although we have many friends, no one is more of a friend — or should be more of a friend— better put, than ourselves.
The relationship you have with yourself determines the relationships you allow yourself to have with everything else, not just people.
Because you are your best friend, it is important to understand to treat yourself well and allow yourself to be happy. This can seriously impact those things you hang onto, not knowing that you do not need them to create happiness.
In terms of knowing when it’s time to let go, we have to examine if the situation is still serving us. It is very easy (and surprisingly normal) to continue to feed people, places, and things that no longer serve us.
This is why sometimes in our lives, we have to do personally inventory checks or life assessments of the experiences we are allowing into our lives. This is the personal choice that we have to make…To fight or let go.
Once we have identified things that no longer serve our needs or align with our goals, we can proceed to filter them out, if need be. This, of course, is easier said than done.
Once, you have identified that something is becoming toxic in your life (maybe the dying relationship, the uneven friendship, or unhealthy work environment), you, yes YOU, have to make a stand for the good in your life.
This is the part where most of us trip up at. Although we know the answers to a lot of our problems, it becomes an internal battle of the self. But because of the challenges, it makes us stay instead of leaving when its time to let go.
We know we are good enough, or at least believe it to some degree. We know that we are not happy or something is not adding to our happiness.
Then we must accept that the time is over and holding on any longer than necessary is not going to be beneficial. When it’s time to let go, that is it. No one benefits from staying in a dead situation.
What can we do to make sure we are giving the NEEDED (not wanted) decision for a given situation. A way to be able to decide when something is in need of change or letting go is to conduct an assessment.
This assessment is to weigh the pros and cons of having a situation continue in your life. This is something that we should all be doing at some point or another in our life since growth and change are always constant in our experiences.
Weighing these pros and cons can help determine if something needs to be removed from your life. When the cons outweigh the pros, it’s time for some spring cleaning.
All in all, the time needed to let something go is not black or white, it is entirely up to the individual. We alone know when enough is enough, (even when we don’t want to accept it) and when the “it” in our life is no longer serving personal needs or goals, we have to let it go.
What indicators in a relationship let you know when it is time to let go? Drop a comment below. And if you found any value in this post please share it, social links are at the sidebar on the top right. Thank you!